My intro to Substack back in February

August Restack

Photo by Ruby Millington

A big hello from me, Rose Rouse. This is my first post on my very own Substack. I edit the magazine advantagesofage.substack.com which is all about encouraging different voices around getting older. I commission different writers every week. AofA is a social enterprise that I co-founded with Suzanne Noble in order to challenge the media narrative around ageing. We have created a tribe (on FB, through events, through performances and films with Arts Council grants) so that older people don’t feel alone. The Sunday Times called us ‘the punks of getting older’ and we are. To create a community so that we can share. From articles on Lone Wild Travels to Dreaming of Dying to Sex Tips for Seniors to Re-Imagining Old. Last year I edited our anthology Sex, Death and Other Inspiring Stories which is full of ideas, personal voyages and creative meanderings around getting old.

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I love doing it all and I thought I’d break out and write my own Substack – thespirited70something.substack.com - as well. Where I can go a bit wilder, more personal and multi-disciplinary.

To get down and nitty gritty with the ageing thing in different ways. At almost 72. To share opinions about what’s going on out there for us oldsters, but also the challenges of being a partner to Mr Judge 81, in North Wales while I live in London. And how we’re navigating a Living Apart relationship as we get older and what that means for us. My first proper piece will be about Changing The Narrative Around Sleeping With My Partner where I will delve into my own adaptability (not the physical but the mental kind) and how important and sometimes problematic this can be. I managed to do it in one important area – bedland – and it was unexpected and delightful. My delight was around thinking I was stuck – and I was – and then becoming unstuck!

My partner, Asanga and I, at a Space Party earlier this year

I still work. I worked as a freelance journalist – of the rock n’roll kind and later features for all sorts of publications including the Guardian, the Standard and Time Out – and still do occasionally. Often about issues that affect oldsters. I did one about the horror of Granny headlines, in other words, all older women have children. No, we don’t. On another anti-ageism note, I was recently reassured when I found myself in the Emergency Care Centre off Ladbroke Grove, West London – I couldn’t breathe, I had a chest infection, my lungs were rattling ominously – and the young male doctor actually asked me if I still worked. That seemed like a good thing and progress. There was no automatic assumption that I’d retired.

And I write poems – my first and only so far pamphlet Tantric Goddess – was published when I was 64 and now I’m almost 72 and doing an MA in Poetry Writing. It’s challenging and exciting. This is the rebel flowering bit. I’m a big believer in staying curious and doing new stuff. I tend to be eclectic in my leanings so doing this MA is a deep dive in the other direction which is scary in itself.

This poem is about my partner. I wrote it early on in our relationship and is in Tantric Goddess (Eyewear). He's a climber and this is all about the performance element of bouldering, this was down at Borth y Gest near Criccieth in North Wales.

no ropes no ropes no ropes

like a balletic welsh goat

he devils the overhang

a saucy clamberer his ferocity

belies any sinking libido

before me he’s a circus performer

eager to reverse salty-old-lady disapproval

I intend to include the mistakes I make along the way as I travel along the ageing road. As a proud Hag, I don’t subscribe to wise Elderhood, I subscribe to staying curious and being able to admit my own shortcomings. A few months ago, I wrote an Opinion Piece for the Guardian which was about being a modern grandmother but also the slip ups I’ve made. Being insensitive to a sleeping baby ie making too much noise, not taking my shoes off and much much more.

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2024/oct/14/grandmother-baby-parents-son-parenting

I thought I’d start by writing one piece a week for Mondays, then share a poem/fragment/opinion on Fridays. And see what happens. I am going to start off charging £3.99 a month. I hope you feel that’s a good deal. You are welcome to subscribe for no money (you’ll receive half the pieces) or even better, go mad and make a paying subscription now before I put it up. I truly appreciate your support. And hope you enjoy the articles.

I can’t wait to see what flows forth and what discussions we can have about being old and how I/we’re dealing with this and all the societal ramifications.

I hope to make this a warm environment for exchange…